Thursday, 29 December 2011

he's departed

Two days ago, I read the status that my sister posted on her wall...
"A father lost his son, A mother lost a child.. Innalillah... A battle for almost 5 months.. Semoga roh berada dalam golongan orang yang beriman"
It was just four months ago when I went to visit him. Its really hard to hold back my tears seeing him battling with his lifeline and I couldn't do anything except prayed. May Allah S.W.T give His blessing onto him, his parents, the doctors and the nurses, and accept them among His servants that enter paradise by His mercy. Surely Allah knows best and may his parents patiently accept his departure.
'Be sure we shall test you with something of fear and hunger, some loss in goods or lives or the fruits (of your toil), but give glad tidings to those who patiently persevere; Who say, when afflicted with calamity: "To Allah We belong, and to Him is our return"; They are those on whom (Descend) blessings from Allah, and Mercy, and they are the ones that receive guidance.' - Al-Baqarah (Quran 2:155-157)
The Eyes Tear
The Heart is in Pain
But (with my tongue) I will only say that which is pleasing to Allah

Friday, 16 December 2011

Friday, 25 November 2011


SubhanAllah, such a beautiful song by Talib al-Habib,

we are indeed a traveler in this life... may we all safely arrive in the Best of destination, a place we never have ever imagine, a place where souls rejoice in peace.... Eternally...


Monday, 14 November 2011

Preparation for the other half

       In this life, we spent almost half of our age in preparation for the other half, maybe 25 years of schooling for another 25 years of working, and 25 years of working for the 25 years of retirement.. This worldly games are tiring and never ending, problems arise after another pass, like chasing our own shadow we'll never being able to outrun it... Until we enter the grave, then we realise we spent 75 years not in preparation for the Eternal one.. but then of course, it is too late.. 
'Competition in [worldly] increase diverts you
Until you visit the graveyards.  
No! You are going to know.  
Then no! You are going to know.  
No! If you only knew with knowledge of certainty...  
You will surely see the Hellfire.  
Then you will surely see it with the eye of certainty.  
Then you will surely be asked that Day about pleasure.'
- At-Takāthur (Quran 102:1-8)

may Allah S.W.T protect us and grant us goodness in this life as well as the hereafter, Amin..

Friday, 7 October 2011

Husband 101

1) Love Allah
2) love His messengers
3) love your mother
6) love your father
7) love your lovely wife

"isteri bukanlah untuk dimiliki tapi amanah yg perlu dijaga"

Saturday, 3 September 2011


Alhamdulillah, our walimah has been smooth yesterday.. A new life, a new responsibility and a new ibadah for me and my lovely wife. May Allah bless us with this akad and make us closer to Him. Of course there will be bumps ahead but insyaAllah we will do our best and get through it together :)

Honeymoon in Penang - 11.9.11

'we are not perfect and we'll never be, yet I pray that Allah makes us perfect for each other'

Thursday, 25 August 2011

his lifeline

I was at the hospital
and he just lay still on one of those bed

his sadness, pain, and burden can be seen in his eyes
but he can't speak, nor move.. yet it's obvious

I can't bear to stare his eyes as its start screaming
when the nurse push a tube inside his breathing stoma
and his mother tries to calm him down

his parent, the doctors, and the nurses
they are his lifeline, replacing the duty of his spinal cord.. how can they ever be that strong

I prayed for him despite his young age
which ever Allah knows would be best..
that he will live a healthy life, or depart with a healthy soul....

"You'll never know how strong you are until being strong is the only choice you have left"

Tuesday, 23 August 2011

after iktikaf

Alhamdulillah, it feels very peaceful now, sitting at the faculty bus stop with beautiful half-moon above waiting for subuh prayer.. Its not 'The Night' that I'm looking forward to, for my deed will never get me to His paradise, but it is His mercy. And with that, I prayed He will love me and my parents and include us in the group of servants which will enter Paradise without hisab.. Amin ya Rabb

Sunday, 21 August 2011

how to save a Life...

     This video make me sad, it shows just how we don't care enough for others who are in need, SERIOUSLY in needs.. Some of us will look at this video and cry and some will take a step further to make a little donation, but after a while we'll forget about them as if it was never happened.

Its not just food and medication that they need, but also everything else... education, infrastructure, technology and all the things that can help them built a better life for their future generation. But now even to have a future generation is a struggle.

Sometime I question myself, what for do we became a Doctor, Teacher, Professor, Engineer or Economist if we can't even make change to poor people living inside our own neighborhood. And what will we answer in front of Allah s.w.t for the knowledge He lend us. At the end of the day, we all are nothing more than a politician in our own field if we don't have a pure heart.

Saturday, 20 August 2011

Wednesday, 17 August 2011

Cahaya Syawal

Ya Allah, Jadikanlah aku suami yang soleh, penyayang dan berlemah lembut serta dekatkanlah aku kepada keredhaanMu dan keredhaan ibu-bapaku, Amin.

Tuesday, 16 August 2011

mimpi dari mimpi

Semalam aku bermimpi
mimpi dari mimpi

Hujan dan berbasikal
satu putaran kemahuan yang kukesali
perlu juga digagahi untuk bersolat jumaat
melalui dewan kuliah bertingkat-tingkat
dari lunsuran dan anak tangga

Aku keluar dewan kuliah dan terus belok ke arah masjid
tapi banjir menyekati membuatku basah kekotoran

Bisikku, aku harus pulang ke rumah membersihkan diri
sementara sejurusnya menyaksikan keanehan-keanehan yang tak teringat
entah bagaimana aku tiba-tiba ke rumahnya
dan duduk bersama wajah-wajah yang kukenali

Ayahnya, teman-teman sekolahku, berbicara soal pelajaran
barangkali semua menunggunya utk keluar meraikan tamu hari raya
seolah dapat aku baca isi hati teman-temanku yang menyimpan perasaan kepadanya

Dalam kesenyapan aku hanya duduk di kerusi paling hujung
mungkin sebelah itu adalah biliknya
kerana terlihat botol-botol ubat dari celahan pintu
aku menunduk saja dengan perasaan ingin meminta diri

Tiba-tiba adiknya keluar memberikan sebuah kotak
dikatakan tinggalan kakaknya buatku sebelum keluar negeri
hatiku penuh persoalan.. mengapa?

Dalamnya terkumpul bermacam-macam barang peribadi
plasticin untuk menampal nota, pemadam-pemadam dengan contengan kata motivasi,
dan yang paling aku ingat..
sebuah jar kosong yang akan ternampak bayangan Taj Mahal dibalik sinaran matahari

Aku kongsikan perkara itu kepada si adik
aku gembira melihat keindahan Taj Mahal dibalik bayangan jar kosong
gembira dengan pemberian kotak peninggalannya
gembira dengan pemergiannya
gembira mimpi dari mimpi..

"O Soul, thou art at rest. Return to the Lord at peace with Him, and He at peace with you." - Darwaza-i rauza of Taj Mahal

Friday, 6 May 2011

In the End

       A beautiful song by Yusuf Islam, formerly known as Cat Steven prior to his conversion. I always find my self struggling inside to become a better person. Sometimes, listening to his songs give me the comfort and that little bit of strength I need to keep holding on.

"Verily We have created Man into toil and struggle" - Surah Al-Balad (Al-Quran [90:4], Yusuf Ali translation)

It's hard, it really is... but I need to keep fighting, because it's what's in the end is all that really matters.

"But the Hereafter is better and more enduring" - Surah Al-A'la (Al-Quran [87:17], Yusuf Ali translation)

Tuesday, 19 April 2011

I'm 25

         Right at this moment, I reach a new phase of my life and its been a colorful journey with so many bumps and joy. Still wearing my lab coat, pondering on what are the next sequence of latters should i lays my finger on, and counting seconds as I turn 25 in USM's School of Biological Sciences. I guess the only thing I want to say right now is 'Thankyou Mom, I love you' and 'Alhamdulillah'